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I remember when I was a little girl and I always had to fart in Church. I tried to squeeze my ass cheeks together to hold it in but that only made the fart come out with a louder screeching sound. Then I would crack up and start laughing. It was scary and hilarious at the same time. My parents were so embarrassed that their sweet little girl would fart in church and stunk up our entire pew. Oh No!!! Clear the hallway, get out of the way and prepare for a mad stampede to the bathroom. Lizzy the Queen Of Farts is desperate to use the toilet and finally makes her way to her thrown. Lets hope she has a plunger and plenty of toilet paper near by to help her through this Diarr Emergency! Just be glad YOU don't have to clean her toilet!!!
Why don’t you fart in church?
You should take all of the above advice to heart and follow it just in case, so you can make a smooth transition should it ever be necessary. I know how long his residency lasts. Become a Redditor and subscribe to one of thousands of communities.
To the individual who asked, "Am I dating a douchebag. Thanks again for the continued comments and replies to my edit. On the plus side though, after you leave the church, you'll get to spend the remainder of your days bashing it on Reddit. Men search the world for women that they can stand to be around with long-term.